# Embracing My Gender Journey: A Path to Authenticity
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Chapter 1: Exploring My Style
As I navigate my gender identity, I find joy in wearing skirts and dresses. The question lingers: will I ever feel comfortable wearing them openly?
My fascination with jean jackets has become an ongoing theme in my life. Once we return to the US, I dream of attending therapy or support group meetings dressed in a manner that reflects my true self.
I have a collection of three sheath dresses that I can’t wait to pair with a jean jacket or a denim button-up shirt. Recently, I experimented with a short-sleeve button-down, and it filled me with optimism.
I tried various combinations: one with leggings and black sneakers, and the other with my black flats, leaving my legs bare. Both outfits looked great, but the leggings made me feel incredibly tall. Ultimately, I felt good in both choices, embodying the polished look I strive for. For warmer days, I envision a button-down shirt, while colder days will call for a jacket and leggings.
Yet, I grapple with the anxiety of stepping outside in these outfits, fearing the stares of others. My hope is to remember that life is fleeting and to embrace my true self, regardless of external judgment. It’s vital for my wife to understand the depth of my need to express my identity.
Section 1.2: Living Authentically
Even if my go-to outfit is just a jean jacket over a stylish blouse with cargo pants and sneakers, I would find contentment in that.
Living in Mexico has been an interesting experience. I’ve overheard English-speaking neighbors remarking on my choice of women’s t-shirts. One day at the beach, I realized a group nearby was discussing the trans person sitting next to them—only to discover they were talking about me!
This realization highlights my tendency to overlook my progress. I am already presenting as a woman in public. Yet, I yearn to explore clothing more freely, aiming for femininity without overwhelming my wife.
I’ve even considered wearing compression shorts under my skirts or dresses for added comfort. This way, I can feel less self-conscious and perhaps alleviate any fears others may have.
I know that it’s not always easy to navigate these choices, and I sometimes find myself overanalyzing. While some may view me as unconventional, I strive to care less about their opinions.
Chapter 2: Moving Forward with Confidence
The video, "The Transphobes Are Miserable," provides insights into the challenges faced by transgender individuals. It explores the societal issues surrounding gender identity and offers encouragement for those on their journey.
In this landscape of self-discovery, I recognize the need to let go of the desire to please everyone. It’s another topic I plan to discuss with my therapist, as I continue to embrace my identity and the complexities that come with it.