The Profound Yet Painful Reality of Pursuing Happiness
Written on
Chapter 1: The Quest for True Happiness
It's a common desire to seek happiness, yet our actions often contradict this aspiration. I personally spent four months in Thailand this year, residing just two minutes from the beach with only a backpack to my name. Despite having less than ever before, I experienced unprecedented joy in my life. However, I often felt a void, regardless of the stunning sunsets, vibrant parties, or delectable meals.
The human tendency to chase after more—be it a faster vehicle, a larger home, or a prestigious job—can lead us astray. Yet, true happiness is often overlooked and is right in front of us.
Section 1.1: Scientific Insights on Happiness
When pondering what truly brings happiness, science offers clear insights. During a reflective moment, my best friend shared a profound realization: "The goal isn’t the goal. The journey isn’t the goal either. What truly matters are the people who accompany you on this journey."
His words resonated, especially when considering the extensive research conducted by Harvard over 80 years, which revealed a crucial finding: the quality of our relationships significantly influences our happiness. It’s not wealth, health, or status that determines our contentment but rather the connections we forge with others.
Subsection 1.1.1: The Impact of Relationships
Section 1.2: Societal Influences on Happiness
Our behavior can often seem contradictory. Despite knowing that relationships foster happiness, many of us spend excessive time working, binge-watching shows, or ignoring calls from loved ones. This isn’t entirely our fault; society ingrains a scarcity mindset in us.
Advertisements and social media create a perception of lacking, making it feel like we need more to be fulfilled. Corporations eagerly provide the 'solutions': new perfumes, cars, or weight-loss supplements, reinforcing the idea that we are never enough.
Such a mindset can lead to regret later in life. In her book, The Top 5 Regrets of the Dying, palliative nurse Bronnie Ware shares that three of the top regrets are: “I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends,” “I wish I hadn’t worked so hard,” and “I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.” All these regrets center around relationships and the time we invest in them.
Chapter 2: Embracing Abundance and Connection
Don’t fall for the scarcity mindset. While it’s admirable to grow and aim for success, remember: you are already enough. Instead of perpetually chasing the next big achievement, cherish what you have and share it with others.
Reach out to your mother to share your weekend highlights. Organize a meetup with a friend and enjoy your favorite drink together. Take your date to a cherished spot of yours.
“Shared joy is a double joy; shared sorrow is half a sorrow.”
— Swedish proverb
This animated short captures the bittersweet essence of life and relationships in an artistic format. The beauty and devastation of emotions are beautifully portrayed.
This video explores a poignant love story set in a post-apocalyptic world, highlighting the depth of human connection amidst adversity.
If my writing resonates with you, consider joining Medium for unlimited access to valuable articles from me and other talented writers. If you're ready to break free from feeling stuck and cultivate a meaningful life while embracing authentic masculinity, join over 1000 others in the Authentic Men Tribe by subscribing to my free 5-minute newsletter!