Chapter 1: The Dawn of Answering Machines

I vividly recall the excitement of purchasing my first answering machine, which accompanied my very first phone in my own apartment. This moment symbolized a significant leap towards independence, enabling me to manage my household while staying connected with loved ones.

To set the scene, this was during the late 1980s, well before mobile devices inundated us with emails and texts. The answering machine was my answer to the challenge of juggling multiple responsibilities, ensuring I didn’t miss crucial messages when I was occupied elsewhere.

However, when I was at home, there was a common instinct among many of us to dash for the phone as soon as it rang. I must confess that, despite my extroverted nature, there were times when I craved solitude. After a bustling day at work, I sometimes needed a moment to recharge.

During those moments, I would find myself thinking, “Perhaps I’ll let the machine handle it.” Though not a frequent occurrence, guilt often held me back from fully embracing this idea. Allowing the machine to take the call without feeling guilty usually meant I was genuinely unavailable—perhaps in the shower, doing laundry, or with my hands messy in the kitchen.

Reflecting on it now, callers wouldn’t have known the difference between my presence or absence. In hindsight, my guilt about not answering when I was home was probably unwarranted, but it contradicted the norms of that era.

As a diligent researcher, I often pondered which of the seven deadly sins this behavior might fall under if I ever needed to confess. The closest seemed to be sloth, but if my reluctance was simply to recharge so I could engage more positively later, could that truly be deemed sinful?

To provide some context, at that time, I was working in a bustling call center, spending seven to eight hours a day on the phone. It’s no wonder that the last thing I wanted upon returning home was to engage in more phone conversations.

While I sometimes felt guilty for not answering calls, I now recognize that those moments of disconnect were a primitive form of being "off the grid." In retrospect, this was likely a healthier choice than I initially acknowledged.

Fast forward three decades, and my attitude has shifted dramatically. Nowadays, I can’t fathom answering every call that comes in—not merely for the sake of recharging, but because 90% of these calls are telemarketing solicitations.

While I welcome calls from certain charitable organizations I support, I often find unsolicited calls attempting to sell me unnecessary items, seeking opinions I prefer to keep private, or asking for donations to charities I haven’t fully vetted to be bothersome.

Ironically, my first job was as a telemarketer. I recall interrupting people's lives at inopportune moments, which was unfortunate for everyone involved. However, we approached our calls with respect, never pressuring anyone. A simple “not interested” was sufficient for us to move on. I can’t help but wonder if there’s some cosmic retribution at play now.

These days, I let voicemail handle incoming calls, which seems to deter many of these unwanted solicitations. I empathize with legitimate telemarketers, as their roles have become significantly more difficult due to people like me opting not to pick up.

This evolution in my perspective is striking: Thirty years ago, I wrestled with guilt over letting the machine answer when I was available. Today, even if I am home, I often choose not to answer simply to avoid solicitation calls. The best part? In today’s world, this behavior is widely accepted and completely guilt-free!

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Thank you for taking the time to read!

Have a wonderful day,

André

Chapter 2: The Shift in Social Norms

In this section, we explore how the acceptance of letting calls go to voicemail has evolved over the decades.

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